No Regrets, No Grudges
Reading multiple books at a time, researching like crazy, to acquire knowledge, finding issues with certain social setups that others around find "normal"- I should have known it from the beginning that I should be a writer. Now I feel sometimes that I have wasted 40 years of my life trying to prove my worth, doing things that hardly mattered to me or anyone else. I could have dedicated that very time to writing. However, I am an overthinker (every writer is), and reanalysing my own thoughts again and again (just like falling in love with myself) has led me to a very eye-opening conclusion. That is, nothing in life is wasted. So finally I can say I hold no regrets, I hold absolutely no grudges. All my emotions I pour into my writing, through words, through the characters- good, bad, ugly.
My health is at its highest low as of now. Oh, I am very much aware of the atrocious grammatical mistake committed in my last sentence. That was deliberate. Life is full of mistakes. Some are due to lack of awareness, some by choice; whatever the reason, it's ultimately our life, and we should celebrate it. My issue had always been my health, always. In my Anthology Book, "Braved Inked Emotions," curated by Roma Gupta Sinha, I have penned my journey as a sailor, initially, and then how I ultimately gathered the courage to rise to the rank of Captain, because I realised it's my journey and it's my ship. Now I know, no matter how strong the storm is, I have to hold the mast myself. So, despite my health status, I would be carrying out leading and continue to be the proud Captain of that very ship- my life.
Most of my time nowadays is dedicated to writing. Even when there are times when I don't feel like writing anything, I just write in my diary, one sentence: " Today, I don't want to write. " And I am startled to find that this one line then starts poking me to write another, just to match the previous line, and then the third. It may sound unreal, but I myself sometimes get surprised by what my pen can do at that moment. That is the magical power of writing for me. And that is where my passion lies. I am sure we all have our own passions, and if we can nurture them consistently, without fail, one day they can surely bear beautiful, juicy fruits.

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